Miss Hidayah Nasir and her Chocolate & Popiah.
I thought i wasn't able to fast today so, as I asked Hidayah to bring along some food for me to eat just in case i'm able to break-fast in the middle of lesson time or whatsoever.
And she bought a bar, a big barrrrrr or chocolate and popiah, she had popiah inside her bag.
"What'd you bring me?"
"Oh, I've chocolate, popiah... all."
LOL. How cute. Of all things, popiah.
But i only wanted chocolate so i GOT chocolate from this lady. (Yes, not the popiah)
She said the popiah's nice though. I couldn't eaten em, you know.
But i, in the end didn't break my fast.

Half the chocolate's still in my fridge.
That $33 chocolate (;

Eh, F la. Really. I'm annoyed cos of everything that's happening and now this?
Can i just have someone to talk to?
Can I?
JUST ONE PERSON WOULD DO.

Dah la, goodnight.

lovedrunk

I want fried mars bars.
I want cheese fondue (sounds a little weird, don't you think? But i've been wanting it for months now!)
The Friday Night Boys - You Do, You Don't is amazing.
A really nice song.

Tomorrow's Be Yourself Day and Aces day the same.
I don't know what to wearrrr.

You don't really want to.

Know what? I don't care. I don't want to care and i don't think that you will ever care at all. You don't know me anymore. You really don't. Forget it. Forget me. Forget everything and anything at all. Pretend like you never knew me because I think now, you really don't.

I don't know how i feel.
I wanna be mad at you but i know i can't because you used to be there for me. I wanna be sad about it but i know that this is not worth crying over.
I wanna feel good that i still have you as a friend BUT I can't.
You have been neglecting me.
You have been neglecting me, a whole lot.
Okay, fine if you wanna ignore me but you treat people or make that me, differently in a not so good way.
Some, very very nice. Some, just a plain... Nice.
And for some, you just ignore.
Now, i can never know if you talk to me only cos you pity me or you wanna talk to me for me.
Oh, whatever.
You are not the person i used to know.
And i can hear it through your voice.
Whatever. Like, wtvs.

Oh. WATCH THIS!

I think the only person i need now is you.
You, yes, you.
I don't know if you're able to understand what I'm going through since we're worlds apart but you can try if you want to.
I cannot stop this. I've been wanting to be myself for such a long time and yes, I am myself all these while but sometimes i feel that, i don't belong to a particular place, a group, specifically.
No, I'm not saying that i choose the wrong people to be with or whatsoever but, i feel so... not in place, you know?
People would kill me to know that I've typed that all out but, I'm honest, it is how i feel.
I don't know where I belong to. Know that feeling?

Yeah.

Until You're Mine by Demi Lovato.
Yes, Until You're Mine now doesn't remind me of the past anymore. I don't know why but it is a very good thing though. The song has a very different meaning to it now and i kinda like it. It's so... Meaningful and I used to cry to this song but not now. I'm over it. I so so am. I'm over everything. & My mind's made up.
I know of other real friends who'd always be there for me.
Not step over me all of that.
Akmal said that my life's dramatic because I've a lot happening to me at once but I guess, that's how it is... Me to go through life the 'hard' way first before going through the easy ones.
Nah, i shall not be so sad over these kinda things. Not worth being so flustered over.
So... Here I go again...

Zahrah for every single thing that she have done for me.
She is the very best. She has never not been there for me and whenever we argue, we know that we'll make up the next few minutes. I am sorry. Sorry if i have been neglecting you and not talking to you very much because I've been totally occupied with school and I can never actually manage my time well... Sorry. But you know i love you so so much for everything.
You've been nothing but the Best Friend to me.

And, Hidayah even though i know that we don't talk much when we see eye to eye, you are always there for me to talk to me and keep me company. Just so you know, our pact is still on and the buka-ing together is, too.
Woman, I love you.

Nadhirah and Syahirah and Fuad, yes. You three... These three people have made me feel the best ever anywhere, anytime. You guys are awesome and you know I love you very much.
Thanks for always listening to whatever crap that I say and all of those...

Fouzan, You are always there for me whenever I've things to say or whatever else to complain about. Fouzan, don't emo emo anymore kay. Cheer up (:
I hope you will be okay soon already! Thanks so much for everything.
And i mean, everything.

And not forgetting the rest,
Nadiah, Vera, Akmal, Yasmin, Murni, Fatin, Rasyiqah, Amalia, Rusydi, Ashraf, Iskandar, Guo Siong, Selynna, Ika and all the others. I just love you guys a whole lot. Everyone of you. Tons.

I Love you.
ALL

I can't wait for december, I should later remember december.

Kay, i am HAPPY.
I'm a happy little girl. I'm a happy little girl.
I'm really happy because things happened. Things that i wished for to happen, has happened.
It just did.
I can't believe you remembered which celebrity i used to look up to in the past.
I can't believe that we're of the same age (Because I never knew how old you were before and now I do... Kay, stupid. But, because you were a year before me, I have always thought that you were younger than me)
I can't believe that we're in contact. I can't believe you added me as your friend on this 'social networking site' (i don't want the website to be named. Oh, how lame of you Qazimah)


Thank you very much.

msssngu

Haven't been blogging for a whole week and a lot have been happening.
Both good things and bad things. Weird things have been occurring at odd times, too. Hm.
And, I just gotta know that people, they can just change in a split second. (Okay, i think i knew that like, a long time ago) But now i am wondering whether change is a good or a not so good thing.
And i have learn that in life, problems will never stop unless you work your way through it.
Never hate people because the person you hate might just be your close friend, someday.

Tomorrow's the start of the fasting month and I really was looking forward to be out with friends today, when it rained. How unfortunate. I planned to be out with Nurul Hidayah Nasir when it rained. Wanted to get a present for Zahrah for her birthday which is on the 23rd of August when it rained. I wanted to get Frozen Yogurt, the thing I have been addicted to after Selynna made me eat it since what, thursday when it rained. I planned so much for nothing.

How great.

Both my legs are hurting.
WHY?
STUPID 2.4KM RETEST HAPPENED.
Unlucky much.

Ah, i just so hope i won't screw up for Maths.
I don't wanna flunk it. I studied hard for it. I don't wanna disappoint them anymore.
I don't.

Never put your hopes too high because once you fall,
you fall hard.

i have came to realize that, i miss you. i miss you a lot. But what can i do? I miss you keeping me company every night.
Don't tell me that you've been too good that you forgot who have always been there for you to cheer you up whenever you are down.
where is that friend? where is that person? i really, really miss you. Just so you know, you have been really good and always there for me.
i love you a lot to just throw this friendship away. Although things are wayyy different than it appears to be now, You have been real awesome and you've been a super great help.
Thanks for everything.

I miss you, friend.

I miss being noisy during madrasah and the guys (and girls) disliking us for being such a noisy bunch of group.

I'm totally unprepared for the fasting month!
Like... So fast like that eh.

Ohmy, i miss Murni and Yasmin.
& Fouzan PLEASE CHEER UP :DDDDDDD
I hope things'll go well with you.

i want chocolate.


not worth pursuing, like an arrow penetrating my heart.

Everyone's so unlike themselves nowadays.
And people whom i think are going to be themselves for the rest of their secondary school lives are not gonna, anymore.
It's so different.
Everything is...
Gotta get used to it, i guess?
But, i don't think i can because these changes are MAJOR ones.

Well, anyway,

HAPPY FIFTEENTH BIRTHDAY, AKMAL DANI (:
hope today was fun for you.

Tomorrow's Monday and tomorrow marks the day of the first common test that the school is going to have. And tomorrow's both English and EBS (Elements Of Business Skills) I haven't even touched my EBS book at all. Now, what does that make me?
Uh, i shall promise myself that I will study though... later.
(Ya, right Qazimah. You say that ALL the time but you'll end up doing other things that aren't as important as your studies)
tsktsktsk.

& you guys really gotta listen to Patron Tequila by Paradiso Girls.
Funny song.
"Who wanna get fcuked up, I do! I do!"
WHAT THE F right.

I'm gonna transfer songs to my phone and then study already.
Adieu.

You had your dreams I had mine.

The whole Angklung, BV Choir Group and the Guzheng had to perform at Neptune Court and so my day today = fun, fun, fun, full of laughter and more FUN.
Performed I'm Yours, Stand Up For Singapore and yeah, Voices From The Heart.

Ms Safura blanja us five of us for dinner.
Nad, Sya, Rusydi, Fuad and myself.
Erwin and his clique were too malas to make it. Rasyiqah could not, too. Matin had to go home and STUDY. So, it's only the five of us that wanted to have dinner and we did.
Met Family there.
(That was actually why i wanted to have dinner at Simpang because I know that my family would be there)


Sat with Amalia on the way to Neptune Court.
Sat with Vera when it we were on the way back to school.

Fuad, Hedzir and Matin tried to scare us, Amalia and I by talking about real scary stuff and I had the urge to 'slap' them, you know! But I, of course did not. Like omg. Urgh, irritatingggg la.
The two of us went to the toilet to change and they guys SWITCHED OFF THE LIGHTS IN THE TOILET AND Nad and Sya, Amalia and I who were there, freaked like mad.
Because it was really dark and scary as it was night time already.

They really scared us.
I got scared. Really scared.
But it was fun though. I had a good time laughing.
I enjoyed the day, pretty much.
Okay, actually, just the picture time with Amalia and the last part of the day, which was dinner with them four and the part where the guys tried hard to scare us.

(:

Those cheering up when i really needed it? Thank you.
You apologize when you think that you haven't done enough but, that's okay.
You don't have to worry about that because by what you used to helped me with, it is already enough. I realize how much i miss your company. I really do because you used to make me laugh and you didn't mind me 'bullying' you and me being so sarcastic at you just for the fun of it. I am sorry if you took my jokes real hard but i really was joking and i hope you don't mind. I miss all your lame and crappy jokes that used to make me laugh so hard that my stomach hurts. How you made me trust you and I, being the good friend, trusted but you never stopped your habit. You said you'd try but you never did. Just so you know, I miss you, friend... I miss you and your company.

&omgilike send it on by the jo bros, demi lovato, selena gomez, miley cyrus and the others all in one video. It is so nice to see. (:
WATCH IT.

my faith has lost it all.

Had hi-tea at Carousel in Town on Monday with Family and I'm glad to say that it was the best. My uncle treated my brother, grandmum and I, too. It was sort of a belated birthday treat for the three of us.
How awesome.


I loved it.
Walked around town and went to Ion Orchard.

It was... alright.
I wanted to get things but nah, forget it.

And today was the best day I've had out of the whole other weeks.
The three of us walked home together for the FIRST TIME SINCE IDONTKNOWHOWLONGALREADY.
Sang Hi-5 songs with Rasyiqah in the library since there wasn't any music lesson today at all.
Discussed about Celebrities with Rasyiqah for the FIRST TIME EVER EVER EVER.
Watch Selena Gomez and Demi Lovato's Vlog on the comp with her, too.
Crapped lots.
Ah, i just loved today so much.


strum the guitar.

She had a world of chances for you,
Chances you were burning through...

What did I do to deserve this?
Tell me the truth and don't lie
You're pretty good at that but, no not this time.

You feel your heart beat deep down
Ignoring the shame of causing this pain,
Just get out!

Ask yourself. Ask yourself WHY.
And what good will it do to you.

F****

These are the shows that i love when i was youngerrrrr...
(I know it is very weird but, I love it, so?)
-

But before that! These are my favourite Hi5 songs :D



"Show me an L, show me an O,
Show me a V and finish with an E,
L.O.V.E, I love you and you love me,
L.O.V.E, that's the way it's meant to be...
L.O.V.E, I love you, you love me, wooooo!
I'll always love you across my heart.
L.O.V.E, LOVE!"

Ready Or Not.

"Hide your eyes and count to ten, ready or not?
I'm gonna find you again,"



"You are, some kind of wonderful... You are wonderful,
you are, you're everything to me, you're wonderful to me!"

I would like to thank SELYNNA so much for surprising me with Demi Lovato's New CD, Here We Go Again! Ah, I so love you minah! *Kening naik2* LOL.

Yes! I now have Demi Lovato's New CD, Here We Go Again in my hands!
I love it oh-so-much.


Outing with Selynna and Insyirah today.
Selynna's friend, Dexy was supposed to come but she couldn't.
And my friends, Hidayah, Amalia and Rasyiqah... they were supposed to come too but they in the end, couldn't.
So today was girls day out.
Selynna bought frozen youghurt with Marshmallows and Strawberries as toppings, and well the three of us shared a youghurt.
Walked around and laughed over the silliest stuff.


We wanted to walk to Tampines One when we were being called by some woman from Singtel (There was a huge singtel roadshow at level one) who made us sing to the tunes to our 'favourite' song(s) in order to get free prizes eh? Think so.
And so Insyirah & Selynna sang Stop & Stare by One Republic.
Oh wait. Not only sing but, DANCE TOO!
We had everyone staring at us! GAH. Mortified!
LIKE HELLO! WE HAD FREAKIN' SANG IN PUBLIC. HOW EMBARRASING WAS THAT?!

But i guess it was worth it because Insyirah, Selynna & I got THE PUSSYCAT DOLLS TEESHIRTS FOR FREEEEEEEEEEEE! How awesome right.
We got changed to the free tees and people kept looking at us and they said something like, "Eh, pussycat dolls siaaaa." Well, we were in the center of attention for the day! :D
People kept looking. Cool, cool. ;D

Went Starbucks for a while since Selynna wanted Mocha Frapp.
Sat, chatted, camwhored.

Yeah, I know... you can now see how senget my bangs looks like.
URGH I SO HATE IT SO SHORT LIKE THATTTT!


More outings to come, yep?


Dynamite

Surprisingly, today didn't piss me off at all. Nothing, drove me up the wall.
Because I stayed home when all the others are in school.
(grins) YAY. *You can't blame me... I was too tired form everything!*

Oh, and there's a continuation to my lovely and oh-so-adorable 'senget' bangs, you know.
I made my mum cut it again to make it not look so weird and evident that it's not super straight like a ruler. And she did. I think my bangs now, turned out better than yesterday, turned out better than before, :D

Selynna, tomorrow, tomorrow! :D

There won't be madrasah on Sunday.
I shall frown now.
-
-
Okay, done.

-.-!

Some people tell me, "Don't give up, keep tryin' because you will soon get it."

Yes, just so you know, i do get it.
I get what I studied. I get WHY i study now.
I get it. I get it.
But, why can't i score for anything i study very hard for?
Why? Really... Why?
Did i not study hard enough or... just, what is it that i don't get?
If i don't get a pass, that means, there must be something wrong, somewhere.
But, i do not know where i went wrong. Do i actually not get it?
No, no! i can't afford to fail anymore.
I would never want to. I am so so tired of being a failure.
Now, it is my time to show that...
I'm me, This, is me. I can do it. And when i say i can, I mean it.


Come on.
You know you can.

you're the direction that follows.

You think of it time and time again.
And you then ask yourself, "Is it worth it?"
You want a lot of things to stay. You want a whole lot of things to stay but you know those things won't. Is it worth tryin' to turn back to how things used to be when it has already passed and if it were to go back to the state you want it to be, is it worth it when everything has already changed?

Do the people you help still remember you as 'the kind friend' or whatever they label you as before, now? Do they know that you're the one who helped you. You're the one who cheered them up and you're the one who would willingly meet them and ask if they're okay?

Would they?


cherry pie