I'm trying hard to be happy today. Really. I'm not these past few days... Not really. I need you. Now. Badly. D;
Went over to Pak Busu's condo and had this thingy function thingy la. And Wan has the same phone as meeeee. Except his is the e71 version while mine is the e63. His is wayyy thinner and slicker than mine. Mine's super fat okay. Finally met my cousins. Missed them so much already. Hehs.
Had fun, actually.
Lemme tell you. Wan bit Zahidah's, Aliah's and my hand. I think he's just too hungry or something. HAHA. So weird. But it was fun.
Had dinner with mum's side of the family. Finally, too. I'm just happy, seriously and i don't know why. Tomorrow's either Maths or EBS retest. Dx
Omg, i dislike this blogskin of mine. So irritating you know. Should change again. The colour just so does not match, right?
i miss you.
It's Just A Lesson That We've Learnt.
March 28, 2009
I Can't Take Another Slow Goodbye.
I'm feeling rather sicky. Sore Throat. Flu but no fever. Well, good enough. Drank Honey Water? Lol, weirdest thing ever, huh? But everyone kept telling me to do it and so, I did. And i, indeed got a little tiny bit better.
"Guess what, I did what you told me to... Well, actually a lot of people told me to do it too la... I drank honey water"
"Yay, Good, Qazimah. You listened." :D i'm happy.
Fixing Back The Pieces.
March 27, 2009
I just want this love to last forever But inside me something's changed... Something for the better.
I don’t know what’s right and what’s real anymore I don’t know how I’m meant to feel anymore When do you think it will all become clear? ‘Cause I’m being taken over by fear...
you should know that i really miss you as a brother, badly. we don't really communicate as much as we usually do nowadays. I find it hard to. Things are just getting in our ways and we don't laugh as much as we used to. We don't joke around like we used to. We don't talk non-stop anymore, anywhere like we used to. It's like, we're not close anymore. not that close, that is. I really miss you, friend. What happened to us? It's not the same anymore now. You are always there for me. You even put away your sleep time to cheer me up whenever I am down. When I cry the other time, you are the only one who asked, You're the only one who looked at me and told me to not cry anymore. And you were willing to listen to everything that i was going through. We're used to be so close. But what happened now? I miss you, friend, very much.
Was it something that i said? Was it something that i did? I'm Just Stuck Inside.
What i wrote above felt like an arrow just penetrated my heart. Hell.
I think I should never be sad as it will never do any good at all. Look on the bright side Qazimah. At least, you still have friends who cares so much for you. =D
Thank You So Very Much, Zahrah, Hidayah, Raihana, You guys rock.
thank you for being there.
Yay, my throat is like a little better than before. OMG la. It's always hurting. But glad it's a bit better now.
And I've to tell you that, Vera is taller than I am! D; So not fair right? She's sec 2. And I am a sec 3. Just by mini-inches though. Haha. Okay, I don't make sense, do i? But still she is taller than meeeeeee! Grow shorter kay Vera? Okay, I'm mean. Lol, Kidding! I stood beside her during Angklung and she is a bit la, a bit only... taller than i am.But Still. Not fair! Everyone is taller than me. Sad you know.
So anyway, I'm addicted to Jai Ho By The Pussycat Dolls. I mean, I've listened to the song wayy long ago but as soon as i read the lyrics properly, I think the lyrics are nice. Like, super nice. Especially this part,
You are the reason that I breathe, You are the reason that I still believe, You are my destiny, Jai Oh! Oh-oh-oh-oh!
Cute? :D
No there is nothing that can stop us. Nothing can ever come between us...
Deep Inside Of Me, I Know That It Is True.
March 23, 2009
Shopaholics why they call 'em my addiction, my prescription, gimme shoes and give me bags How much you want, I need 'em bad.
The Hills, Season Four.
Audrina is just so full of crap, seriously! She sucks la. Grrrr. I'm pissed off. I mean, who won't? Lauren already said "NO." like a gazillion times and Audrina still babbles about why was she dating Justin the other time. And Spencer, so overprotective. If he loves her, he should like, give her a chance, she's not a mannequin. She is a person. A living person who has feelings. Heidi should just leave Spencer la okay.
I know I am a lot slower than you guys who actually watches The Hills and stuff but, i don't care uh. I'm too busy and lazy to go on the net and watch the whole ep and follow through.
Kay ah. Done about the hillsssssss...
Woo, Gahhh! I'm so packed with school and loads of things nowadays. I'm never really free like always. I have my CCA, Extra Lessons and all. Where's my rest when i need it?
I want to go out and catch a movie with my friends. I want to bond with my friends. I want to spend time with each individuals. I want to know them more as individuals as i am always in a group of friends.
I want a headband. Either ared or asilver one. I want a pencil skirt. I want more mini-dresses. I still want the necklace i have been bragging about a few months ago. The necklace that i want my name engraved on it, remember? I want that, badly.
I want a handbag. I want a clutch. I want you.
Okay, enough.
Oh. And.
Raihana, Thank You so much for making me feel a whole lot better.
I can never seem to adapt to changes and it sucks.
I mean, you are awesome, remember the Lauren & Whitney and about the sister-y thing yesterday? Thank you.
And yeah, we miss them a whole lot and all that's left to do is to let them know how much you do... I just hope i kind of made you feel better yesterday. Yes, I Miss Them, So Bad. D; and i mean it.
7TH APRIL 2009 7 PM ILUMA SHOPPING CENTRE (Opposite Bugis Junction) AUTOGRAPH SESSION + SHORT PERFORMANCE. David H.O.T Archuleta is cominggggg to Singaporeeee!
I am 151.2 today!! -.- I wanna be like, at least 1.6? If not, 1.55 at the least? URGH.
I'm like so bored now. No one's texting. You're not, either. D;
yeah, i know it's true and i want you to know that i do.
Love Game Intuition.
March 22, 2009
I Need You More Than You'll Ever Know...
but somewhere we went wrong.
I can read the lines on your face, And they're telling me everything I already know. You are light-years away from me. and I am slowly sinking under alone... So I act cool on the outside but it's eating mealive. Cos when it comes to you there's nothing I can do. I can't make you love me when you don't. I see it in your eyes, all the compromise. I can't take another slow goodbye.
You're A Trainwreck,
But With You, I'm In Love.
Oh. My. Gosh. School is like what. Tomorrow? Shit. One week really isn't enough and really, holidays should really mean holidays you know. I hate it that they said it's holiday but it actually isn't. We will still have to come back to school for a lot of stuff. Extra Lessons, etc. etc. And it only spells B.O.R.I.N.G! What the hell, right?
Oh well I'm happy that things are now wayy better than before. Seriously. My life is superb. My friends are better. Everything is so great now. All that is needed is for me to do is to concentrate in class during lessons and never get anymore U's.
I PROMISE.
Thank you Nurin Umairah for lending me your lovely mini-dress. I wore them just to try it on and it fits me perfectly. Can i have your mini? Haha, Kidding! I'll wear it out if we were to be out to shop or something someday okay? (;
I feel like going out with people, my friends. I wanna shop with them. I want to be out. No, home is not boring. Home is so relaxing but i want to shop la. I wanna be out with the people I don't really go out with or something. Can ah? I feel the real need to shop or catch Hotel For Dogs, since i was kind of ditched the other time... Confessions Of A Shopaholic. SHOPPING!
Yasmin wrote in her blog that Demi Lovato reminds her of me. Ika invited me to an outing with Zul & Ashikin. Haha. I'm being so lame now.
I wanna go out. Out. Outttttt.
Sigh, School? (Yawns!)
show him what i've got.
No, You Can't Read My Poker face.
March 21, 2009
Deep inside, I know that's true I'm stuck in time, I'm stuck on you...
I think that now's the time for everything to change... for the better, that is. Maybe i was wrong for wanting to give up on this thing that we are all working on together. What went wrong? What made us all drift apart? I used to think that things are far wayyy different than before when we were younger... but reflecting back on the very long conversation we had on the line yesterday, made me think that giving up on what made me what i am now is not the best thing to do.
We actually do understand each other. We really do, very well. It was just misunderstandings that made it all different. The way we are all thinking now made things different. Maybe the only reason is that we are all maturing and that we want to explore and go through things our own way. That was what i used to think and maybe now, what is used to think is true. We finally talked things out and apologized. I'm sorry for being too narrow-minded. I'm sorry for being such a pessimist. I'm sorry i could not adapt to the changes before.
But at a standpoint, i think i was kind of right about a few little things.
Sorry if this seems pretty mundane but.
I'm sorry.
things are just so peaceful and really simplistic nowadays. not much of a drama at my part. i got through everything with the help of a few of my friends, thank you so much you guys. i'll always love you. :D no more drama. no more cat fights.
it's just witty.
how could you swallow me again?
And You Promised Me Forever More.
March 20, 2009
Don't hang up, Can we talk? So confused, It's like I'm lost. What went wrong? What made you go? Don't pretend you don't know This is me, I'm unchangeable. When did we fall apart? Or did you lie from the start? When you said, Its only you I was blind, Such a fool Thinking we were unbreakable It was you and me against the world And you promised me forever more Was it something that I said? was it something that I did? Cuz I gotta know What made me unbeautiful.
I've been told whats done is done. To let it go and carry on and deep inside, I know that's true... Im stuck in time. Im stuck on you We were still untouchable.
Lesley Roy's Unbeautiful.
It's totally how i feel now. The highlighted part, that is.
Q: "As to compare to Minibits & Diva, which is cheaper uh, Zahrah?" Z: "Did you just said witch?" Q: "What? Which, what do you mean which?" Z: "You said which, w.h.i.c.h or w.i.t.c.h?" Q: "Huh? Oh. No, I said bitch." Z: "What? Bitch? BITCH??" Q: "Ohhhhhh! (laughs) I said which, which!"
LOL. I think only Zahrah would get this 'bimbo-ness' I was so blur la! So, so, Outing with Zahrah yesterday to tamp's library. like what. 4 hours of studying?
And she and i met my mum for dinner at Tampines Mall and we went home after that. Yes, we obviously camwhored but i kinda lost the pictures because i forgot to upload it to the computer and that i changed my phone to the new one this morning and the pictures i think, are now kinda gone? Sorraye Zahrah! I loved the pictures we took and, I totally loved yesterday. I am serious.
Finally, a blogskin. A proper one! I was lazy the other time to edit the blogskin and stuff so yeah. That was why i was stuck with that simplistic one.
I have done that E-learning thing. See, i'm such a good girl, right? Whatever.
I feel like going out again. But don't know when uh. To watch Hotel For Dogs since Emma Robert and Jake T. Austin from Wizards Of Waverly Place acts in it. So wanna watch it. Waiting For Confessions of a shopaholic to come out, too. Yay-ness.
And i think I miss Angklung. So sudden, huh? yeah, i'm pretty random nowadays.
Okay, later.
i don't wanna be lonely. i wanna be wit'ya.
It's Mine, Mine, Mine :D
March 18, 2009
E63.
I, today tried doing Lauren Conrad's loose braids but failed after so many tries. D;
Wooo. I finally got the phone i wanted for so long. :D All thanks to mum! I love her oh-so-much. (; But you know, she still buys it for me when I have let her down so many times. I am sorry, mum. Yeah, this time round, I'll make sure I do well for anything and everything. Oh, right. I shouldn't just say it. I'll work on it too and i now, mean it. I will understand what is going on in class and i mean, really understand eh. Not pretend to understand when i first understand after being explained to and not understanding it after that. -.- So wth, i know, right? Sighs.
So, things bought today? - E63 Phone. - Charles & Keith's High Heeled shoes for myself!
Finally. A pair of high heels for myself and it's exactly my size. I can so fit it. And it fits perfectly, too. Yay.
And i walk wobbly on those pair of five-inches. I can't even walk properly when it's not even five-inches la. And now it's a five-inch high heel and i so can't walk with it. Nevermind, I'll try and try and try as long as i don't fall kayy. (;
It's funny how Selynna and I got new phones at the same day. She has the cutest LG phone and it's pink. Cute, huh?
Okay okay. I missed the hills today. D;
I dreamt of you twice last night and i'm starting to miss you now.
I'll Never Break Down.
March 17, 2009
Break It Apart.
i have disappoint to both my parents. i totally flunked my maths, music and EBS CT1 and my mum was super not-over-joyed. I could tell, she was damn disappointed with me and i, well... cannot do anything about it now. I cried while on my way to school just now. She have never been this mad and disappointed with me. I have never been this sad either. Well, i was glad I was better after meeting my friends and Yay my music teacher put me in charge of the music blog i was supposed to make for the music class but i so far haven't done anything about it. D; I'll do it tomorrow. But, it's very the leceh. have to make a new email account just for the blog. Gawd.
I'm so tired. And good thing there isn't anymore school for me tomorrow. Double Yay-s. :D
I don't know why but i can't seem to play the angklung when standing up. It's so weird.
And and, Get Well Soon Zahrah! :D She is again, sick. Pity her! D;
I'm glad that the Physical Education project we're assigned to do weeks ago is now in the teacher's hand. I'm so so glad. Passed it up today morning since there was Maths Remedial, Music Lesson and Angklung today, back-to-back. Whoa. I'm super tired! But you know what what what world? I freaking got my phone back and I'm super super happy. The phone confiscating part the a few days ago was a total killjoy! D; OMG lah. You didn't know how hard it was for me to sleep without my phone by my side. I couldn't exactly sleep neither do i have sufficient sleep. But since now I have got my phone back, I should really be careful and take good good care of my beloved phone. (Although this phone sucks la) I still need a new phone. This phone's really sickening and suckish. My mum won't allow me to get a new phone yet. Well, not until my phone contract ends. And how long will that be? No, no. That is so farrr wayyy long for me to wait. Never mind. I'll just see how it goes. If this phone dies halfway, good. I'll get a new one. Pffft. Okay, maybe not a new one but an old one. It depends on how it is. I so still hope i will get a new one by the way.
I cannot believe i missed an outing with Ain & Nurin today. I was kind of dissapointed because... well, i've ditched Nurin like, tons of times (zahrah too, actually) And i wanted today to happen but it did not because of my busy-ness. Boohoo. But there is still other days. I wanna be out with Zahrah but she totally can't make it. She is so occupied with her school and stuff. Oh. My. Gawd. How much worse can it ever get?
Oh yeah. I played the drums today. Rasyiqah rebonded her hair and she looks so pretty. I have the sudden urge to want to henna my hair. But oh. It's only a week of holiday... There's still June Hols for me to go through. I'll henna at that point of time, i think and that is also if i'm allowed to. But i so far, have never wanted to either rebond neither colour my hair because it'll spoil my very lovely hair :P Okay. I'm so whatever can.
QAZIMAHHHHHHH thanks for like making me feel better at msn, although it was not by voice, it means alot. cause you actually know when i'm not okayy./ and i miss talking to you! kayy, and i shall listen to what you say, thanks!
- Zulhilmi
Welcome Zul, You dear best friend. :D Haha, I miss you lah. Call me whenever you can kayy? (; Remember, PCD! I'm so into them now. I must be crazy! See lah, all because of you kan. :P
tied down with words.
March 15, 2009
Wrecked.
I really honestly think that, my friends are the second best thing that has ever happened to me. They have always been there for me and they the listening ear. They've heard and seen me cry. They've seen me at my worst. They just. Have always been there for me and I'm so thankful that I have them in my life.
But you know, there are times where you just can't get along with the friend. Disagreements here and there. You think you're right. the other person thinks the other person is right... So you blame each other for everything, true? You push the blame on the other person. The other person pushes the blame on you. And you don't know what else to do but just ignore that person for a little while hoping that person would realize his/her mistakes and you came to know that they don't. What do you do?
The Hills have really thought me how to handle friendships in a better way and that is, to talk things out with each other nicely although you know it may hurt. There's a problem and the best thing to do is to talk it out. It hurt Audrina, it hurt Lauren, they cried.
Things got better then.
But sometimes, some arguments just does not make sense and you do not know why you bother so much arguing about something like that.
Okay, I'll watch more of The Hills now. You know, to save my friendship.
Zahrah, i really appreciate you helping me with you know what. Really. You're the best friend anyone could ever have and i'm lucky to have a super great friend like you. you still owe me a hug! (; Nvm la. I will hug my pillow! :P :D
looking downwards...
March 14, 2009
To The Beat Of My Heart.
I really think that Taylor Swift is one super innocent celebrity... As compared all those Hollywood teen-queens. (I hope you're reading this, Zul cos i think you will like it that i said Taylor is innocent! :P)
I went through sleepless nights without my phone, last night. I felt insecure. I felt sad. Now no one can ever text me till i get my phone back... I can't really call people because I can't remember numbers well.
I miss talking to Zul on the phone. Really! I think I need his company. Chey! Omg. I'm so whatever. I miss Zul a lot. D:
Eh. I'm really looking forward to Monday as i will get my phone back on that day. Sorry, sorry i have been bragging a lot about my phone. Cos i seriously am emotionally attached to it. And i think i will brag about it until i get it back and i will then brag about how happy i am getting it back. Typical of Qazimah.
No shopping today. No phone, no shopping. No phone, no dinner. I didn't go for dinner last night bcos my phone wasn't with me.
So Anyways, http://lookbook.nu/look/66873-I-m-feeling-blackk/ Ika said the model looks like me. HAHA! Cool, huh? I like the girl's bangs. But i would never wanna get my bangs back. Tired of it already. I wanna get my hair curled! :D if not curled, spike it up a little. Love Nurin's hair. Her hair is real cute! Very scene-kid-ish.
I so have to get my arab and tafsir al-wadhih book. I haven't buy it yet since Madrasah started. Gahhh.
Oh Selynna, enjoy your party alright! (; I feel like drinking HL Chocolate Milk and having a chocolate cake. Yums!
My monday & tuesday schedule starts at 7 plus. Monday; Maths Remedial, Music Lesson and then Angklung. Tuesday; Maths, Angklung.
D; Nevermind. It's only two days. i will have my wednesday, thursday, friday, saturday and my phone.
I think my mum has always wanted me to stand out.
I can't wait, to see you again.
ZZZOMGGGG!
March 13, 2009
(Click Image For The Official Bottle Pop Video!)
The good girls suddenly's the bad girls. just because they wanna be a movie star (watch me)
MY PHONE IS CONFISCATED. What the hell la.
I was crying so bad. I was begging for my phone back but I didn't get it back after begging for an hour and a half.
why?
Because my group didn't pass the PE project up. I mean, we've done it and all... we just did not print it out. What the heck? I did everything already and i am to blame when i have done every single thing told. Why? You people will feel nothing, yes. You read this you'll feel nothing but what about me? No one will ever know how i feel inside. I cried like a whole lot today. Both because of my phone and my hard work. It wasn't paid off. I feel so... isolated. Honestly.
I have never felt so disappointed with myself this much before. Okay, i have disappoint my parents a lot and now what will they think of me? I don't want them to think that i have morphed into somebody who's not me. Somebody who is really different from who i am because i find myself changing and i don't even know if this change is a good change or not.
I was banned from going online just now afternoon so i marathon-ed myself to The Hills Season Four from episode 1 to 4 and fell asleep after that. I didn't sleep good. Something was bugging me. My phone was not with me. I hated it. I hated it so much. Why is it me and not the them?
I did everythingand it is all done.
Sighs. Whatever okay. I hope i will be getting it like on monday since there is remedial then.
OHMYGOD!
i don't want to care.
You Might Find Who You're Supposed To Be.
March 12, 2009
I Found Time To Heal Most Anything , At Fifteen.
My phone's being a real pain, a total b****! Hate it. I totally totally need a new phone and i mean it. I still want that Nokia E71 Blackberry look-a-like phone. It is so cool yet stylish. (:
Oh My. I'm so tried. Okay, i have been complaining about my tired-ness since yesterday and this sucks. Never mind. March holidays are like days away and I'm so looking forward to it. Yay. But there might not be any outings since we have insufficient time to enjoy the Holidays. D; 1 Week Holiday for me is still not enough! Sighs.
Had Hairstyling course today and Rasyiqah, Amalia and myself made friends with the Malay lady, Liana who actually thought me how to braid a lot. Not just three but a whole lot. Cool, huh?
Shared my Oreos with Rasyiqah during Angklung.
Rusydi was supposed to walk home with me after Angklung because Amalia went home with Abdillah but he had Ngaji so had to walk the other way. He insisted on me following him to the other way but i was as usual, to lazy to do so. Heh.
Done.
(:
You know who you are, i miss you already lah! D;
The world i see is perfect now, you are all around.
March 11, 2009
We Couldn't Change It If We Tried.
(Demi and Selena looks so so pretty at the above picture!)
HAPPY SWEET SIXTEEN, SELYNNA! :D
OMG! I'm starting to not really like school as it keeps me very busy that i rarely have time and home and it adds up to the March holidays. Wth? I am too tired and i need rest rest rest. Oh, right. Rest. If i need rest, i should not be blogging? Should i? But.like, one week March Holidays. I mean, what are holidays for? Holidays = Rest. Sleep time. Say hello to late nights. Like, duh? So why have extra lessons and stuff? Gawd. School now mostly ends at around 6 and i don't have enough sleep time. You know, maybe i shouldn't blog daily because it'll only make me more tired. Never mind. I will only be occupied for three days of the March Holidays. Two days of Angklung and two days of music lesson and maths remedial. Grrrrr! When am i to get my sleep? Oh. I am such a complainer. Don't mind me. I honestly think that is just typically me to complain. D;
I need The Hills, i need music, I need books and magazines to keep me awake. I need magazines to keep me awake in school even! Serious. Serious. I have missed 3 Eps of The Hills and no more E! Entertainment. No more celebrity news in mind to tell. Sigh. No more celebs gossip. Wait. Even if i do keep up with Celebritiy news in mind, who am i going to tell? There is no one for me to tell right? Dumb.
GaGa. GaGa. GaGa. Convict GaGa, Ooh! Sorry lame.
Oh. My. Goodness. Gracious.
I'm straining my eyes to type. I think i will really fall asleep once my head hits the pillow. (Yawns!)
I think i am going to sleep la. Tired. I am addicted to Hey Monday's homecoming.
And so.
Akmal Dani, Akmal Syazwan!
Akmal Dani - Enjoy Msia. :D Akmal Syazwan - Enjoy your pulau ubin camp kayy.
Gonna miss ya.
don't let your heart go just yet.
March 10, 2009
Should I Forget About It All?
Sometimes I wonder how's it gonna feel... Will my first love be true and real? Will I be ready when my heart starts to fall? What will I do when my love comes to call?
I'm proud of myself. I'm sad. I'm confused. Don't know if i should laugh about it, cry about it or just not care about it all. I don't know how or what i should do.
are they real? are they fake? serious about it or just faking it to just put a smile on a face? something doesn't seem right. i'm confused on how to feel.
i miss zulhilmi, yasmin, murni & rasyad. D; Murni Iskandari! I'm sorry! D;
Oh. Something kind of cheered up me and i don't even know why ah.
Asked Fouzan (Madrasah classmate) to link me up.
QAZ: Hello. (Inserts bloglink to name) Fouzan: hello.. wanna get to know you more. haha. (: QAZ: haha, link me la. I think you know who i am seh. haha do u know? LOL! :D I link you kayy? Find out who i am. (:
So guys in our madrasah don't pay attention to the girls like we do.
i'm crazy today. Sry for the lame-ness!
what to do next?
It's Never Simple, Never Easy.
March 09, 2009
Go on, prove it, I'd love to see you try... Convince me that you gave me the world I tried and tried but, you never opened your eyes.
How Should I Let It Out? Should I? Should I Not? Should I Like This? Should I Not Like This?
I am so confused.
Thanks Sarah Afiqa for hearing me out, I really appreciate it you know :D
Nvm, moving on!
Okay today, i shockingly bonded with Weslie over a rock band. He made me listen to Atreyu and we talked about concert moshing. He was so mean la, he said i needed to be carried to watch concerts since i'm too short He also said that I'll get squeezed by the crowd since i was too small. -.- LOL. He's fun to talk to and like, we spent the whole english period talking about Rock Bands. Well listening to Unholy Confessions just now gave me goosebumps. Grrrrrr! Just so you know, I'm not into rock/metal anymore... I'm more into electro-pop and those Lady Gaga/Pussycat Doll-ish genre now. Is that electro-pop?
Don't know what the genre's called eh.
Amalia and Rasyiqah came over to do the P.E Project we're assigned to. Still not fully done yet! D;
So anyways, here i am to presentttttttttttt......
Hot dance crew right? Zul, Rasyad, Sarah Afiqa and a few of their crews are in there! I know! Wooooo~
:D
what is wrong with me?
March 08, 2009
What is this thing inside of me that I'm feeling? I don't know how to let it out. It got me thinking though out, day and night. I want to fall asleep with you in my mind. -xoxo
I don't know what is wrong with today. I don't know what is wrong with most of my friends or... me. Is it just me or everyone else? I feel left out. I feel somehow, neglected? I feel... a bit... i don't know... It's an unexplainable feeling. Neglected? I sometimes feel left out when I'm with my friends, honestly.
Oh just. Never mind that.
Ridwan's 21st Birthday.
It was quite fun... I had my hands on Guitar Hero. Yayyy! And, i won too! player 2 rocks! :DD We played some random song lah. i actually wanted AFI's Miss Murder but Shafiq insisted on some random song so i just agreed and played, twice uh. Heh!
The cake was a Hazelnut.
I like Mac's Black Forest Ice Cream and madrasah today? Sighs.
i want to see you smile. i need you now, i miss you
danceworks 09' - Flash Ft DC (: Can't wait to watch the vid, guys.
March 07, 2009
When I am down and all alone, You are the one who cares, When I am weak, you make me strong... And I know that you'll always be there.
I'm tired of the hurting Is it really worth it? Am I all alone again? Cause I am kinda feeling like I'm screaming With my mouth shut When it's really open...
I don't know how i feel. Help me out of this confusion.
I haven't done my maths homework yet =/ But never mind, i'll do it like, later or something. It's quite easy so i can do it like later or tomorrow or the day after tomorrow since there's no maths lesson on Monday. (: I'm so not looking forward to my EBS neither Music CT results and i do not know why. I'm just afraid. Heh.
I need to shop shop shop. Okay, maybe notneed but want. I seem to have run out of clothes. (Not exactly lah, but...) I want more printed-tees, leggings and dresses. I don't have a lot of those... I want dresses very much though. I like mini-dresses! They are so lovely and cute. I've only three of those and i want moreeeee.
Oh well, if i don't get those things i crave for above, i want a new phone. Haha. Kayy, i think i sound spoiled! I shan't ask for anything more but a new phone...
My mind is made up and okay, yes yes, i want a new phone. I need a new phone,specifically. My phone is starting to suck.. It will switch off by itself and since my phone is the slide-phone, whenever i close it as in, slide it down.. it will switch off by itself. Like, wth? I can't stand it and it will also only waste my phone's battery. I want Nokia's E71. You know.. I have mentioned about this particular phone numerous times but i want want it it so so bad bad! It's the blackberry-look-a-like phone uh. I would never want slide phones anymore. I've had and now, have them and it sucks? D;
Most of my friends want touch-screen phones and stuff but i don't. I find it very, leceh. But cute :P
Whitney Port is off to New York to work for Diane Von Furstenberg
and i think i would want to work for a magazine company in the future. It would be cool, i guess. Awesomely cool. (;
6 Mar 09, 22:37 Hilmi:) - Hilmi.. Which Hilmi? Oeps/Bedok View Hilmi, huh? :D
6 Mar 09, 22:05 Fuad - Haha, I am fine and dah lah. Stop it okay, I'm scared of cats, so whaaaat! HAHA. (;
runway evolution...
March 06, 2009
No One Else Can Speak The Words On Your Lips, Drench Yourself In Words Unspoken, Live Your Life With Arms Wide Open, Today Is Where Your Book Begins, The Rest Is Still Unwritten...
we know, but were not certain how can we be , how can we see what's ahead? the road keeps on turning and all we can do is travel each day to the next... come on, you know it's your time to move... let's go and leave it all behind, your past and mine. Demi Lovato - Our Time Is Here
I wrote a song about your eyes and I used to cry all night. but, not anymore... i have moved on. I'm happy that i did.
Audrina's a total... (no word can describe it, seriously) And, What the heck is wrong with stupid Spencer? Why is Heidi listening to her freaking boyfriend? Holly is Heidi's sister and Spencer chased Holly out and said Heidi wanted her out? Wth?
Yes, sorry! i get mad watching Audrina and Lauren crying over fights today on an episode of The Hills. I just feel like, you know, screaming and telling them to make up and not cry and get their face all wet. I hate Spencer and I'm starting to really dislike Heidi, obviously because of Spencer. Whitney's okay. I like her... She's pretty. She looks a little bit like Aly Michalka. :D
Gosh, i miss talking about Aly & AJ. D; I haven't been on an Aly & AJ fan site for like, weeks? (No Zul, They do not have big jaw lines lah! :P)
Hm, let me just forward today.
Got CT results back and i swear, i did terribly bad for Maths. Seriously. I'm sort of used to it.. but now, i don't want to get used to 'i did terribly bad for maths.' it sucks!
I mean, what happened to me not wanting to not let my parents down? What happened to me to want to score high for it? What happened to me to want to be happy because i passed it?
I so had those positive mindset at first and i thought i, yes... was going to do quite okay for it but the results turned out bad.
i flunked it.
Heckkkkk. Am not gonna reveal what i got for it and i never will.
But I am glad that i got a total of 37/40 for English. Like, wow? So unexpected. I actually had the thought that i would fail it when i did the paper because i was kind of sick at that point of time... i had fever and was sneezing and coughing non-stop that i couldn't concentrate much but i was surprised that i passed. Ben got the same marks too. Congrats Ben. Oh Well, Congrats to me, too! :P
Um, I, honestly miss a lot of people you know. Like, I miss laughing and talking on the phone or texting them, meeting and hanging out with them as individuals or groups.. (Well, so far never groups) but, ya. I miss them. I miss them truckloads. D;
How Do I Feel Now? I feel... i don't know? Weirdly-happy-yet-sad-and-confused-but-calm(!?!?) So how do i exactly feel? No Word Can Describe It.
I like Homecoming by Hey Monday.
I'm pacing, impatient Up in my head Taken back to the sidewalk Where we met And carved out our names Do you remember that? I'm coming home, I'm coming home Did you take off while I was gone? I missed it all, I messed you up I missed you. Descending, I'm spinning Lost all defense How could you swallow me again? I left you, I meant to Couldn't let you in Never mind a single word I said You've got control of me Is this the end of me? 'Cause I just can't cut up the strings I'm coming back for more Don't let your heart go Please don't walk away.
haz, 4MAR09: Thanks Haz. But still... care to tell me who you're? (:
this innocence is brilliant, i hope that i will stay...
March 05, 2009
I can be your symphony, Listen to me all night long, If you give me what i need, I can be your favorite song... I'm glad i am over you.
I am blogging today because i feel much much much better. Yay, right? (x
Oh Well, I can't help but say that I'm happy today... I'm happy that things with me and everything...( like every single thing that used to be the problems or cause of fights) are well. I'm not the middle person anymore. I don't have to side anyone when arguments starts and stuff like that. I don't have to cry each night thinking of the things i would usually think about anymore.
I'm a happy happy girl today. (well, except for when i got my maths paper and got to know that i flunked it.)
Other than me being happy, here is another side of me not being happy... I dread P.E! P.E s.u.c.k.s! Like, OMG, really. I hate it. I was so perspiring profusely lah and Rasyiqah and Amalia said that when i pespire, it's like as if i've just finished taking a bath. Wth? HAHA. We had to run like, two rounds around the whole estate and stuff and like, i don't like to sweat. I couldn't stand it after a round. I was panting non-stop and Dary was my motivator, actually. Thanks eh. He was like, "Faster run or i will step on your shoe." or something like that. LOL. But still... Hehs.
I am tired actually. I kinda missed two eps of The Hills! Ahhh, gawd. No, I'm so catching those eps tonight. I so tape recorded it with Smart TV. Heh.
I got a Demi Lovato Bookmark :D All thanks to Afiq. He was like, "Eh, Qazimahhhhh!" (Shows the Demi Bookmark) "OMG! Demiiiiiii!" And snatched the bookmark away from Afiq's hand. "Tapi entah lah, tu aku jumpe punyer tau." "Ala, i don't care ah. I like."
Went home with Amalia, Fuad & Rusydi after Angklung. I love them all loads.
(:
Okay, i am already tired.
i miss Zahrah D; Haha.
don't know where to turn, i've been stuck in this routine, i need to change my ways instead of just being weak. i don't wanna be afraid, i wanna wake up feeling beautiful today... and know that i am okay, cos everyone's perfect in their usual way, you see... i just wanna be me.
March 03, 2009
I have to find a way, To fill this hole inside, I can't survive without you, Here by my side...
(i think Demi Lovato looks so melayu at the picture above)
I think 30 Seconds To Mars' The Kill is super nice. I like Jared Letto's voice, his voice is super-duper hot hot hot! :D
So anyway, I like playing Labyrinth on the Angklung because it's a nice piece to play along to. Gawsh, Tomorrow's is Angklung's rehearsal but well. I'm lazzzzyyyy! But, nevermind.. It's labryinth is what we're playing and i so so love the piece so why not attend, right? Hehs.
Music common test today was fun. It's so cool and yeah, i was the distraction because i kept coughing and sneezing non-stop lah but oh, it's a good thing that i was never being sushed-up. But yeah. It was fun.
I, honestly have nothing else to do that i am blogging right now. Oh oh. my gawd, my nose is like hurting so bad uhh. D;
Sorry, need rest. (; But as if im going to sleep, huh?
you were romeo and i was the scarlette letter...
March 01, 2009
"You left me, teary eyed..." You're invisible, Invisible to me... My wish is coming true, Erase the memory of your face.
I feel sick I have a slight headache and my throat, it hurts. It's hard for me to swallow things... I've sucked like, 3 lozenges today and it was of no help, obviously. If those things cured my sore-throat, i will not be complaining right now, will i?
Tomorrow's Maths CT. Ahhhs, nevermind. I'll study as soon as my brother get home at night with the calculator in his hands. I've misplaced my calculator and it's well-scribbled. It's all covered with Good Charlotte, Avenged Sevenfold & BFMV in ink and i don't like how it looks. So ugly. That was so sec one when i was super obsessed with metal/rock bands so ithose bands down... Well, i dislike metal/rock now, quite a lot. Those bands used to give me nightmares. Grrrr, goosebumps!
Oh hey, iskandar, cheer up! :D
Ohohoh! YAY, ZAHRAH IS BACK HOME WITH BITES AND HEAT RASH! :P What a pity. Hope you get better soon, babe. (;
The confessions of A Shopaholic book that i am currently reading is due tomorrow and i'll have to return it, i don't think i can extend the date anymore as i've been doing that like, twice. Not fair. D; I am in need of a new phone, seriously. This phone that i'm currently using, s.u.c.k.s! Ew. It really sucks! It will switch off by itself and everything. I need that Nokia E71 phone. Please, please, please let me have it! That blackberry look-a-like phoneeeee. O.o
Went Tamp and then to Simei for Shopping with my aunt yesterday and i only bought a clutch bag. WTF? I wanted dresses and handbags but nevermind -.- Lunch at Pizza Hut, Dinner at Eatzi.
Rushed over to Akmal's as it also was Yasmin's birthday yesterday and she's what... three? I think. So cute! I made an attempt in walking with high-heels and i suck at it. I can never stabilize myself and Aliah who is 12 walks elegantly with her 5inch. I am so jealous! D; I almost tripped by the way. Embarrassing!
Am i thatkind of a loser?
i seriously do not know what is wrong with me.
I get so green-eyed over the simplest things and i know that i can't get what i want.. which is you... and maybe that made me all green eyed. yes, i love you. I don't know why i do. I need someone. right. now. so. badly. why can't i get over something that is so long over? i miss the laughing, the exchange of feelings and you. everything is all so different now... what should i do? why is it so hard for me to? we are so drifting apart and i miss you. what happened to all the talks that made me be me? what happened to you, the person with the listening ear, the one i'll always turn to at times of need? will i be alright without you in my mind? should i be okay or should i not? i tried so hard to and i still do, a lot. Will i be happy if whatever i wish for, come true? i still cry almost every night because the thought of you will leave me teary eyed. if not cry, the feeling will strongly live and it leaves me the feeling of hurt and anger and the feeling of misses. what else? I tried and persevere but nothing is happening. you used to be my motivation. but i tried not thinking of you once and everything turns messy. so topsy-turvy. Everything that i do without you in mind will turn bad, will get messy. Can't i defend myself? Do i need you in my mind all the time? What what what is wrong with me?
why is it still you? Are you the best that i think that i can get? Are you so great? that when i'm hurt, i still pretend that it's okay and that it is not your fault at all when it all is?
why that sudden change of mind? It made me cry so bad. Why, you? i've always wanted to give up but i can't. but, why still you?
HECKA.
enough is enough.
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Qazimah, sixteen.
temperamental & do not like sleepovers. 15 july 94.
